Am I A Lesbian Julie ???

There was a time when I was writing for this blog when I honestly wondered if I was going to find erotic lesbian fullfillment, skin to skin, ever again ....I was a fulltime worker and fulltime mom, I was fat, depressed and MARRIED to a man who is kept in the dark about all this. But thre rebel in me that once needed to do things like get stoned in high school, make prank phone calls, and flatten the tires of a teacher who pissed me off, is somehow able to reconcile the "wrongness" of what I do ....although I am more mature and careful about alot of things these days.  On the naughty side, I was always one to take some serious chances ...I promise I am not making this up ..I gave a guy a hand job in the backseat while my mom was driving my boyfriend and I across state.  I wore a plainly see through black shear top on a mall hangout friday night just to see the looks both my friends and strangers would give me (I was barely 18), and once instigated a MMF threesome with a boy who loved me and an absolute complete stranger ...a magazine salesman who had just knocked on the door !   Yes, I am NOT the sweet innocent angel my coworkers, fellow church members and my family think me to be.   I have gotten away with alot of things, (I didnt get away with making love on the beach, in fact, am lucky to be alive after a four wheel drive almost didnt see us in the dunes and damn near ran over us ...it was a cop in the four wheel drive and we were ALMOST booked for public indecency.  

And, oh yes, ...I write a blog about my lesbian desires and experiences.  

I am in communication with some other women met in yahoo groups that cater to women who masturbate together and I am finding out that I am NOT such a weirdo for being as HORNY as I am as often as I am.  I know my libido is a bit higher than most ...perhaps alot higher ..but I am able to remember that there is a time and place for these things.  When it is time to work or be a mom, I know to separate and that  its not time for acting upon the the lesbian sexual doimnatoon of my idle thoughts, but as soon as I get alone or some privacy, I have the hugest need that is undeniably in between my legs, but also, MUCH more strongly, in between my ears.  My sex drive is emotional and affectionate and very much cerebral ...it has words and much more ..and as I have said here before, I was writing erotica on the first word processing program I ever opened on a computer and thats just who I have always been.  I like reading erotica, even bad erotica some merit ...but  frankly, when I get feedback and questions and requests to keep writing, it drives what I confess to be a bit of an ego to create something for the women that read it a feeling and a fly on the wall peek into what is REALLY going on with me, and like Sally Field once said, "you like me !" 

I've said a thousand times on here that I love feedback, and was never getting more feedback than when I was on Facebook before I was booted from there ...but I am announcing today that I will soon be back on Facebook and if you will click the icon on the right when it appears , I would love for you to be my friend ..and I promise not to do the things that I was kicked off of FB for doing the first time...(such a naughty naughty girl I apparently am to those folks)

As anyone who has read my blog for some time, it is almost like a diary of my lesbian thoughts and experiences.  For the MOST part, I have now written most of my actual experiences in detail and incorporated parts of the others ones in some of my posts ...but I will confess that there is at least one of my lesbian experiences that I just haven't been able to formulate the way to present the course of events just yet.  The truth is that the experiences that mean more to my heart than my pussy, such as my first time and my true found lesbian love (who will have nothing to do with me anymore) are the hardest to write about and share ....yet, I realize  that when I let my heart and sexual desires mingle on these pages are the time when I get the most wonderful emails and expressions of how it made you women FEEEEEL ...and of course, what you did about those feelings while reading or afterwards. ZING !   Thats what I like  !   

Life took over recently, and though there is someone nearby that I am developing a relationship with, and a long distance HUGE crush as well, I just haven't been having either the lesbian  sex to write about on here, nor really the personal, private time I use to inspire my stories on here.   Like many writers, I have a list as long as my arm of the "ready to go" topics to blog about here, (all of them alot more fascinating than this BS I am writing today LOL) including some more questions and answers I have shared with some who have sought out my advice (with some details that must be changed to protect the identity of those whose girlfriends may also stumble upon A Lesbian Kiss 2 Desire), the completion of 2 erotic sagas in fantasy which have been partially written and not completed, and what I HOPE will be some revelation of an AWESOME day of lovemaking with a wonderfully funny and sensous woman ..but that will have to wait until we actually DO make love LOL. 

Which brings me to address something that I have been asked by 2 lovers and a potential lover, which is, am I thinking about this damn blog when I am making love with a woman ?   I hope this doesn't make me some kind of crazy in whatever chapter of the Abnormal Psyche 101 book, but the truth is that I DO have flashes of how I am going to write about what we are doing ..and more specifically, I am thinking about how SHE is going to feel if and when she reads what I write about what we are doing.   Wow,  what facet of narcissm does that fall under?   

If you have seen the movie Julie and Julia starring Meryl Streep and Amy Adams, you know its a movie about a blogger who wants to be writer and eventually is able to leave the toils of her regular job to become a real writer.  Did I take this story a little too much to heart ???   Gotta say, I got a little weepy ...it hit close to home ...but they say you have to write what you know, and Julie wrote about cooking.  YOU DON"T want me to blog about my cooking !   I write about my lesbian sexual fantasies and experiences.  

Sometimes the emails I get from readers will compliment me but then say something like "you took a little too long getting to the good stuff."   And in this case, for those readers, I am sorry, but there doesn't appear to be a "good part" in this post.   Not that I am not about the horniest woman in the snowy Shenandoah Valley .   I ask that you hang with me.  A little writers block here and there, and a little time challenged with my real life are causing a bit of a push for my attention.  But I am not done sharing the erotic desire and discovery in my journey that has been unleashed here and has given me an obligation the thousands (yes its scary but satisfying that there are thousands !) of readers of A Lesbian Kiss 2 Desire.  THANK you Thank YOU ..THANK YOU so much for giving me reason to write. 

And...friend me on FB :) I'll be good this time.

akiss2desire