When I was 18 I quit something. Since then my strongest attribute is the fact that I won't quit anything.
I was in an emotional rollercoaster dealing with the death of my father, the apathy of my mother in that she was letting me come and go as I pleased and do whatever I wanted, and the amazing combinations of sexual discovery and freedom, love and lust and adventure. I was 6 years into realizing I was at least bisexual, a month and a half past my first actual experience with a woman, stringing on no fewer than half a dozen guys who were basically fuck buddies but made me feel good in that every one of them in whatever their own sweet way wanted to make us exclusive, and oh I was doing a few drugs and drinking here and there. I was a plumb mess inside and out ...but I had big tits so I was never short of attention. Looking back, I don't know what could have been so bad ...but when I was living it, I was suicidal. Not jump off the bridge suicidal ...there were too many fun things in life to experience ...but socially suicidal in that I needed to end my life as it was. So, in March of my senior year of high school, as a former honor student and 95th percentile type of kid, I couldn't take it anymore and "graduated" from high school Walked out between periods and never went back, got my GED a few months later scoring in the 99th percentile (because there isn't a 100th) and made what I think was the biggest mistake of my life.
So I never quit anything ever again. There are many things I should have quit, and should quit now, but what I came out with from the quitting experience was that I just can't quit.
So ...as I have stated on here, I can't quit this blog.
But I started writing what I wanted to be my signature piece, and perhaps the first piece to be really published at the time I am ready to come out as a legit author if that were ever to happen. My story I have been writing is called "For the Love of Carrie," and its the episode of GCB (Good Christian Bitches on ABC TV) that I want to see. It was the best I could do, but I know it isn't good enough. But it's out there now and it's not only the writing I probably most want to be judged on, it is also the thing that made me say "I quit" a million times through the process. But now, it is finished, and the link for the page for this story is on the right upper corner and is intended to be the one thing I hope visitors to this site will immerse themselves into. Now that this mountainous project is finally done, I think I am ready to go back to the shorter updates and slices of my lesbian thought process. Interestingly, as my posts on this blog have slowed to a standstill the past few months, the readership has been UP . My "greatest hits" apparently just keeps people coming ..and when they come they comment or ask questions ...or get bored and leave I suppose. I am just glad someone likes what I have created ...the high school dropout as a writer.
Let me know what you think of Carrie. Is she real ? Well...yes. Have we (or will we ever) fucked ? Nope. But she and several others from my community are represented and wherever my life takes me, the crush I had on "Carrie," and so led me to write this. My pent up sexuality expressed yet again in fantasy form for all of you to see, and hopefully enjoy.
Now ..since my life is sometimes such an open book let me be blunt and say I am sooooo ready for something to really happen and for the fantasies to come true.
I was in an emotional rollercoaster dealing with the death of my father, the apathy of my mother in that she was letting me come and go as I pleased and do whatever I wanted, and the amazing combinations of sexual discovery and freedom, love and lust and adventure. I was 6 years into realizing I was at least bisexual, a month and a half past my first actual experience with a woman, stringing on no fewer than half a dozen guys who were basically fuck buddies but made me feel good in that every one of them in whatever their own sweet way wanted to make us exclusive, and oh I was doing a few drugs and drinking here and there. I was a plumb mess inside and out ...but I had big tits so I was never short of attention. Looking back, I don't know what could have been so bad ...but when I was living it, I was suicidal. Not jump off the bridge suicidal ...there were too many fun things in life to experience ...but socially suicidal in that I needed to end my life as it was. So, in March of my senior year of high school, as a former honor student and 95th percentile type of kid, I couldn't take it anymore and "graduated" from high school Walked out between periods and never went back, got my GED a few months later scoring in the 99th percentile (because there isn't a 100th) and made what I think was the biggest mistake of my life.
So I never quit anything ever again. There are many things I should have quit, and should quit now, but what I came out with from the quitting experience was that I just can't quit.
So ...as I have stated on here, I can't quit this blog.
But I started writing what I wanted to be my signature piece, and perhaps the first piece to be really published at the time I am ready to come out as a legit author if that were ever to happen. My story I have been writing is called "For the Love of Carrie," and its the episode of GCB (Good Christian Bitches on ABC TV) that I want to see. It was the best I could do, but I know it isn't good enough. But it's out there now and it's not only the writing I probably most want to be judged on, it is also the thing that made me say "I quit" a million times through the process. But now, it is finished, and the link for the page for this story is on the right upper corner and is intended to be the one thing I hope visitors to this site will immerse themselves into. Now that this mountainous project is finally done, I think I am ready to go back to the shorter updates and slices of my lesbian thought process. Interestingly, as my posts on this blog have slowed to a standstill the past few months, the readership has been UP . My "greatest hits" apparently just keeps people coming ..and when they come they comment or ask questions ...or get bored and leave I suppose. I am just glad someone likes what I have created ...the high school dropout as a writer.
Let me know what you think of Carrie. Is she real ? Well...yes. Have we (or will we ever) fucked ? Nope. But she and several others from my community are represented and wherever my life takes me, the crush I had on "Carrie," and so led me to write this. My pent up sexuality expressed yet again in fantasy form for all of you to see, and hopefully enjoy.
Now ..since my life is sometimes such an open book let me be blunt and say I am sooooo ready for something to really happen and for the fantasies to come true.
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